Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Count my Blessings

Recently, out of the blue, this incident surfaced in mind.
It was end of May 2005. I was on my graduation trip - travelling in China and Tibet. I wanted to go back to Langmusi (A paradise), so I had to spend one night in transit @ Lanzhou – one of the cities along the route of the ancient Silk Road. Lanzhou is the capital city of Gansu Province (one of the poorest province in China - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lanzhou), despite its long history, there was really nothing much in the city.
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(Random pictures taken on May 2005 @ Lanzhou)

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As I was travelling alone for that leg, I spent my evening walking aimlessly around the city, trying local food prepared by the Muslim-Chinese, and surfing Internet. I stepped into “an internet cafe” – (well, you know the Chinese standard, it is not the Starbucks kinda cafe), anyway, I checked my email and found that my University last semester result was out.

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I was excited and nervous. I put in a lot of effort during the last semester (despite the fact that I really hated and didn’t see the point in studying anymore – other than getting the college degree). I clicked the result button and I was shocked with what I saw – C+ for my FYP!!! My first C+ for my university result, and it was given to the most important module – FINAL YEAR PROJECT.

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I was devastated and extremely frustrated. I knew I pissed my professor off by challenging him, by going to useful business seminars instead of staying in lab to do experiment etc... But there was no way I deserve a C+. The examiner was commenting that I did a good job during my thesis presentation. I was fuming with rage and felt that it was so UNFAIR.

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I worked really hard for the last semester. In fact, I have no life other than study. While most of my peers were doing 16MCs for their last semester, I was doing 32MCs (and required special permission from the Dean). I wanted to graduate in 4 years like my peers, despite spending 1 full-year in US. I thought of the weekday nights and weekends that I spent in my university lab to study and do this FYP. I spent so much effort, yet, my result was miserable. I was disappointed and very very angry that I was trembling with rage (I think that was my first time).
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SO UNFAIR!!!!
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When I stepped out of the internet cafe, the sky was already dark. I was quite depressed and angry. Then, I saw road-repair works on the side of the road. There was this young guy that caught my attention – he should be around my age or slightly younger. He was perspiring, working hard, shovelling the soil...and his clothes was soiled and torn. It was very clear that he was having a tough time.

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My angry and frustration vanished immediately.

Who am I to talk about fairness?

Has life really treated me badly?

Has life been fair for the young hardworking chap?

On one hand, I felt very blessed to be born in a loving family in Singapore, on the other hand, I felt sad for the young guy. I felt it strongly as I was at the stage of life where i was excited about future, I had lotsa dreams, I just came out of university, I was enjoying my 44-days graduation trip, I already had a job offer from a US MNC etc..
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Then, there was this young chap (around my age) – who was shovelling and working hard at night, seemingly devoid of opportunities and education... It was a sad reality. I hope he would be fine – hardworking people deserve a good life.
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I had been fortunate. Comparing to him, I have nothing to complain about.

My anger was gone instantly.

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It was amazing that perception and emotion could change instantly.

Learn to count my blessing is a great tool to find peace and happiness.

=)

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