Recently, I just celebrated my good friends' 30th Birthday... and a few months later, I will turn 30 also.
That's a really scary thought... and that is the time when quarter-life crisis set in.
We would ask ourselves alot of questions: What have we achieved in the past 30years? What is our benchmark? Society expectation? Peer comparison? Why do we need such unnecessary pressure? Does it mean that if we are below the supposedly "benchmark", then we should be sad or unhappy?
Are these questions necessary?
What if I am "ahead" of the pack, does it mean that I will be happy?
Will winning bring real & sustainable happiness?
Life is like a race.
Sometime you are ahead.
Sometime you are behind.
At the end of the race,
you will realise that you are the only person in the race.
This year, I set certain goals for me to accomplish... and I have been working hard on it... However, I realised that I lost something precious... That's my source of frustration.
I was so engrossed with the goals that I forgot to enjoy my journey (something that I always advocate). I forgot to appreciate the blue sky, white cloud, green trees.... and the beauty of the world. I forgot to show gratitude towards the good things that I am enjoying now. I lost those magical moments when I am so touched and grateful to be alive.
Is it worth it?
I am still searching for the path...
30th Birthday Cake
Celebration of 30years of Wonderful Life!!!
Another random thought:
When I was younger, I was affected when people say that I was childish.
Maturity was such an important issue.
I wanted to be mature. I wanted to be respected. I think I was just too unsure of myself. As I grew older, I met lotsa older, successful and supposedly more mature people. Well, I must say that I am not impressed with them. Not impressed that alot of them are so vulnerable.... vulnerable to their EGO.
The great thing about toddlers are that they have short term memory. They seem to forget all the negative things (like scolding), and be happy with the present moment most of the time. They do not have any vulnerable EGO that they need to protect. They just enjoy and be happy with the PRESENT.
That's something that I want to learn.
I want to be childlike...